How To Accept Yourself The Way You Are
Learning how to accept yourself can be challenging. You’ll never make everyone like you in this life. Trying to please all is futile and a waste of energy.
If you’re shy and a bit introverted it’s easy to start internalising remarks made by others. Sometimes people say things without giving any previous thought.
Envy and jealousy can lead some folk to make hateful comments. They’re often insecure and make themselves feel better by putting others down.
Ask yourself if you really believe those hurtful remarks are true. Can you back them up with evidence? Chances are you can’t.
If on the other hand, you believe there’s some truth in them don’t get upset or allow yourself to focus on the negative.
Identify the areas you feel you need to improve on and create a plan. Don’t get overwhelmed by focusing on the bigger picture.
Making changes takes time. Be gentle with yourself. Set goals and break them down into smaller achievable tasks.
None of us are perfect and there will always be parts of our character that need improvement. For example, maybe you lose patience quickly, or you feel nervous when talking to people you don’t know.
Don’t feel you have to change just to please others.
unless you have a really bad side to your character which I’m sure you don’t, do you really want to change? Too many of us spend wasted time worrying about what others think.
Remember, if your mates are true friends they’d accept you as you are. You should only ever need to make changes if it’s really what you want.
Turn your weaknesses into strengths
Think about what you see as a weakness. If you’re shy and find it hard to make friends you may be highly sensitive.
Sensitive, quiet souls are often very empathetic. You may find it easy to pick up on how someone is feeling. You may be a good listener rather than a talker.
If you lack patience it may be because you’re an action taker. You want things done yesterday and can’t understand why some people are slow to get stuff finished.
If your someone who regards themselves as disorganised don’t look at it in a negative way. It’s easy to get criticised for being untidy, but this is a common trait for creative people.
You’re not rigid in thinking and open to new ideas. Regimented, orderly folk tend to be less creative.
Acknowledge your talents and strengths
Now you’ve learned how to turn perceived weaknesses into strengths, list everything you’re good at. Write them down on a piece of paper.
If you’ve been seeing yourself in a negative light now is the time realise your true potential! No matter how many faults you think you have, I’m certain you’d outweigh them all with your hidden talents and strengths.
For example, you may be a very good listener, a problem solver. patient with children etc. Don’t overlook the importance of your strengths. They are NOT insignificant by a long way!
Everyone has talents. Sadly, many are never fully realised. You may have a natural ability to paint, cook, write, sing etc. Usually people have an interest or passion in areas they’re talented in.
Acknowledging and developing your talents will build your confidence. You may even consider a career change as a result.
You’re never too old to change direction. Grandma Moses only started to paint in her late 70s! She continued to paint right up until her death at 101!
Don’t focus on past mistakes.
Focusing on past failures will only serve to hold you back. You cannot change the past but you can learn from it.
Many successful entrepreneurs have had countless failures before achieving success. Never hate yourself for doing something wrong.
Believing you’ll never be good enough is a sure way to block success. Negative thinking attracts negative energy.
Self-belief plus focus and hard work are powerful ingredients! Even severe disabilities fail to hold back some people.
Don’t let anyone tell you you’ll fail
Jon Morrow was born is severely disabled and only able to move his head. If anyone deserved to feel sorry for themselves he most certainly does.
Yet, despite his challenges, he’s a self-made multi-millionaire. A fine example of what can be achieved using the power of the mind and sheer hard work!
He could have easily given in and listened to doctors who told him he’ll never be able to do anything. You may not become a millionaire but you can choose to ignore the criticism of others and prove them wrong!
Richard Branson could have easily given up after he was diagnosed with dyslexia at school. He did poorly in his exams but that didn’t stop him becoming a hugely successful business tycoon!
If Thomas Edison had given up we’d still be using candles! He failed 1,000 times before creating the first light bulb.
So you see, failure or disability shouldn’t be used as excuses if you really want to achieve something.
Don’t compare yourself to others
We all have our own unique personality and traits. Unfortunately, if you lack confidence and self-belief it’s all too easy to start comparing yourself to others.
You may not be earning the high power salary of a heart surgeon, or have the same stunning good looks as a catwalk model, but you are an individual with a lot to offer.
Comparing yourself to another person is not only time wasting but creates envy and jealousy. It can make you feel inferior fuelling more negative energy and feelings of insecurity.
The person you’re comparing yourself to may not be the perfect idol you think they are. They are human just like you. They may have problems and challenges you never considered.
Just because your best friend has a husband and 2 kids doesn’t mean you’re less of a person for being single. She may have issues she never talks about. She may even envy you for being free and single!
Learn to recognise and identify negative thoughts
You’ll never stop negative thoughts entering your mind but you can decide if you want to accept or reject them. If you note down a negative thought everytime one enters your head you’ll be putting yourself in control.
Focus on how you’re feeling when such a thought enters your mind. Become a witness rather than let negative thoughts take control.
This lets you step back and become an impartial observer. After a while you’ll find that negative thoughts become less common. You’ll still get them but they won’t have the power they once did.
Becoming mindful of your thoughts is very powerful and can be life-changing. You’ll be able to bust through self-limiting beliefs and begin to accept yourself for who you are.
Can daily affirmations help self acceptance?
Affirmations are simply words or phrases repeated regularly. They become embedded in the subconscious with the power to change belief systems.
They must always be words you believe in though. Chanting affirmations you’ve no faith or belief it won’t work.
Create your own, or find some online that are a good fit. Examples include “I am a good and loving person who deserves happiness”
“I am comfortable with who I am” “I have the self confidence to achieve whatever I want”
Learning how to accept yourself is one of the biggest challenges many people face. I hope this post has helped you realise that what others think is unimportant. It’s what you believe that matters.
Wishing you health and happiness:)