Getting Over A Break Up

getting over a break up

Getting Over A Break Up Using The Law Of Attraction

Getting over a break up can be hard. We’ve all been there at sometime in our lives. The pain and heartache can be unbearable. You can’t believe it, and go into shock as your partner announces he or she wants to break up with you.

It doesn’t matter if you’ve been together for 6 months or 20 years, the pain can be just as intense. It’s a bit like a death and you have to go through a similar grieving process.

During this time you may find yourself replaying the break up in your mind like a movie on a constant loop. Crying over photos of you both in happy times, and mourning the loss of the relationship are very common.

It’s an energy thing

Everything in the universe included us is created from energy, and we are all connected.

This energy is in a constant state of vibration, and is attracted to that which is on a similar level. This how the law of vibration works, and like gravity never fails!

When you are first attracted to someone you may find them physically attractive. You like his curly hair, or his stunning green eyes. You love the way his nose wrinkles when he laughs, and the list goes on!

However that is only part of it. That feeling of chemistry you get when you’re with him or her is down to the fact that your energy is on the same level of vibration.

You have so much in common, and you just seem to connect. This energy match is the spark that keeps you together. However we are all constantly changing and evolving in life, and our energy changes too.

As long as you both remain on a similar vibrational level, your relationship will be fine. You both want the same things, and continue to connect.

Your relationship ended because the energy between you changed. It may have been a gradual thing and not something that happened overnight, but it has and now you’re in shock.

You try and work out what went wrong, and why you didn’t see it coming. You blame yourself and wonder if there was anything you could have done to stop the break up.

Re-aligning your level of vibration to save a relationship may be possible, but often there is nothing you could have done if the gap between you had become too wide.

You can’t stop change, and the truth is, in a long term relationship you WILL both change. Your interests and goals may eventually take very different paths.

This is life and nothing stays the same. But despite these changes your relationship will remain strong as long as your energy continues to vibrate on a similar level.

Many couples keep that spark between each other well into old age, and eventually only death separates them.

So how can you cope with a break up?

coping with a break upFirstly, stop blaming yourself. Even if you feel you were in the wrong. This only creates negative energy, and you could end up spiralling down into a depression that’s hard to recover from.

It’s always good to learn from past mistakes, but don’t end up constantly revisiting it.

Being stuck and not moving forward will keep you in a low vibrational state. Sometimes pent up anger after a break up can keep you from moving on.

Secondly no matter how bad you’re feeling right now it will get better. I know you may not believe it but life will go on. Try and think of the break up as a golden opportunity to re discover yourself.

If you were in a long term relationship you may have put aside dreams and ambitions that you can now focus on and fulfill. This in itself can help you cope by concentrating your mind on something else.

Surround yourself with positive people. Their energy will uplift you. Negative people will always leave you feeling drained, and less likely to help you recover from your break up.

How can you stop the pain?

Unless you’re made of stone, a break up will hurt. It can even feel like a physical pain. During times of stress your body releases cortisol and adrenaline.

This is in response to fight or flight that’s all part of our evolution. This goes back to prehistoric times and was a vital part of survival. These chemicals however are very damaging over the long term.

You can stop the pain by simply changing your reaction to the situation, and choosing to feel happy instead of sad. This however is easier said than done, and in the early days it’s better to let these feelings come to the surface instead of stifling them.

You will go through a range of emotions right after a break up, which is normal. Grief, anger, feeling unworthy, even jealousy if another person is involved are common.

You may feel unlovable, and see his new love as being more attractive and smarter than you. This of course is complete nonsense! Allow yourself time to recover but don’t let it go on long term.

Depression after a break up

depression after break upBeing in a relationship often involves sharing a home together, having mutual friends, and feeling safe and loved. You’re not just losing the love of your life but a lifestyle as well. For many couples a break up involves moving to a new area and leaving behind familiarity.

It’s no wonder then that break ups can lead to depression. If you find it hard to concentrate, can’t sleep, and don’t want to socialise long after the break up, then you may be suffering from depression.

If it’s mild you may not need medication, but please don’t let it get worse. If there are no signs of improvement after you do the following then see a doctor.

Here is what I recommend.

Firstly don’t beat yourself up anymore over the break up. Just accept things as they are for now, and don’t try to block sad thoughts from your mind.

You can’t stop thoughts entering your head, but instead try to just observe them with some detachment.

These negative thoughts will disappear on their own, especially if you don’t give them too much attention. A thought can’t stay in your mind for long anyway. It will soon be replaced by another.

Secondly, even if you don’t feel like it, go for a walk outside in the fresh air every day. Exercise boosts levels of seratonin in the brain. This is a feel good hormone and will make you feel better.

If you live near a park, or other green space, try and spend time there as being among nature has been shown to improve depression.

Try and cut back on stodgy comfort foods. Replace them with lots of fresh fruit and vegetables. These have been shown to help ease depression.

Junk foods are often high in fat and sugar which affect the blood sugar level. This can make depression worse, and make you feel tired.

Meditate every day

Meditation is a great way to lift the spirits. You don’t need a lot of time. Just 10 minutes a day is enough. If you’ve never meditated before you can try guided meditation. There are plenty of videos online, or download some for free here.

Take supplements

There are supplements like St John’s wort which can help ease mild depression. If you’re on medication consult your doctor first.

Anxiety after a break up

Anxiety after a break up can occur, especially if you’ve been in a long term relationship. You feel panicky at the thought of being on your own. Moving to a new area, feelings of isolation, and not having your ex to reassure you can trigger anxiety.

Anxiety and depression are closely related, so you may suffer both. Try mindfulness meditation as this helps you focus on the present and calms the mind.

I want my ex back

You may regret breaking up, and desperately want to get back with your ex. Give yourself plenty of space before making any decisions.

You need to give your situation plenty of thought as sometimes couples stay in a relationship out of habit, or simply because they hate the idea of being alone. If you want to get your ex back using the law of attraction, read my blog post 

I hope this article has helped you to see that a break up isn’t the end, in fact sometimes a new beginning. YOU can cope with this situation, and WILL come out stronger!

Take care
Kathy

4 comments

  • James Wren

    This is a matter close to my heart after a bad break up. Thanks for the help.

  • Yes i too dont understand this power of love. Infact i am the victim of true lover. It was an attraction or love i didnot get it but i believe once you are in love u never gonna forget that.

    • Kathy

      Hi Deepenbabu, yes I agree, you never forget someone you were truly in love with, and it can stay with you for a long time.

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